Be At Peace

Be at peace. Do not look forward in fear to the changes of life; rather look to them with full hope as they arise. God, whose very own you are, will deliver you from out of them. He has kept you hitherto, and He will lead you safely through all things; and when you cannot stand it, God will bury you in His arms. Do not fear what may happen tomorrow; the same everlasting Father who cares for you today will take care of you then and every day. He will either shield you from suffering or will give you unfailing strength to bear it.

Be at peace and put aside all anxious thoughts and imaginations.

--St. Francis

I found this amongst all my boxes from moving--it was in a card that my Grandmother gave me one birthday. Thought I'd share for it is a message that I need to be reminded of often! Hope you are having a great day and God bless!

Stress

In 25 days, my life as I know it will end. Meaning I will be graduating from University and I will no longer be a full time student. Now I'm just one of the thousands of people searching desparately for a job. I have applied to so many different hospitals that i don't even know exactly what the different hospitals have to offer. I'm just throwing my resume everywhere and have not gotten any bites. Stress is a great companion right now in my life. I still know that God is in control and that someday, I will get a job--I just do not like the feeling that I am graduating without any idea of where I am going and therefore, I must go home.

I have spent the last four years at University to avoid the stressful job seeking. Who knew that when I started, the economy would be at an all time low the very year I graduated. God did. I must find comfort in the fact that God knows what is going to happen and that He will take care of me. That is hard to do right now at this very moment, but most of the time I am content with what will happen. Right now, however, all I want to do is cry and sleep until I can wake up and not feel stressed anymore. I think this heat is making me tired. Please keep me in your prayers as I continue to apply and look for jobs. Thanks!

Job Interviews...and Rejections

Yeah, they happen and I have become to realize, are no fun. The interview itself was a great experience and I knew that the position had many people after it, but I still have the deep feeling of inadequacy. I know in my heart of hearts that I was qualified for the job and who knows why I was not asked to move on in the process, but they liked me enough for an interview and that is a step closer than I have gone before. I now also have some experience in that area. Next time, I will do better.

I also need to remember that God is in control, I need not worry. God was not surprised at the fact that I did not get the job, God has something else in mind for me. Don't get me wrong, I'm not sitting around waiting for God to bring something to me--I've been applying to different hospitals like crazy and continue to look at different places to apply. I know that whatever comes of this job search, everything will be okay--life will continue. I need to remember that I am extremely blessed as is and the world will not end if I do not get a job right after graduation. Maybe I'll be working at Starbucks until something comes up. Who knows? God, and God knows my dreams, my passions, my desires and God is not going to cheat me of them. God is not someone who looks down and thinks about all the ways to torture me, ways to make me feel terrible and inadequate. No, God made me with all of my passions, desires, dreams, hopes and with a good reason! The road of trust has been hard, but I have slowly been crawling down it toward God. The more I crawl, the more I realize that God is always with me and helping me through life, the more God helps me to stand and walk beside me. It is such a comfort to know that I am not alone. Ever. I am excited to see what God has in store for me.

Oh me oh my

So today I applied for a job. A real job. A job that becomes a career, not a job that is part-time to get you through college. I applied for a job that I am supposed to have after college. The job that my four years of college has prepared me for. I applied to be a nurse at a local hospital. The thought that I took another step today towards independence is a little scary and exciting. I have been looking forward to applying to this job for a really long time--and there was a huge disappointment upon arrival of this day, but God is good and I put my trust in God that I will be where I'm to be. Now I just want to be done with school to begin my life as a nurse. **Sigh** only 11 more weeks!

Rainy Friday

It's raining outside! YAY! Guess what I had plans to do today? That's right--I planned to wash my car today. My car is absolutely filthy and this rain is not powerful enough to cleanse my car so it will just look worse when all is said and done. Oh well! I'll get it washed on another day and enjoy the rain that is falling now.

I just finished my second week of my last semester of university and I am in shock of how much I have to accomplish before I can acquire my diploma. God is good and God's grace is getting be through the semester one day at a time.

The girl that I am going to room with once university is complete and I have been looking for apartments online. I have been getting really excited about being able to live with only one other girl in a cute apartment in a complex that has many amenities offered. It has been fun looking and we have both become excited about what to expect and what we want to do with our apartment. I hope that everything will work out!

I also joined a gym...we'll see how long this lasts. Hopefully a while, especially since I have a roommate who goes so we can motivate and encourage each other toward our respective goals. Enjoy your weekend y'all!

Why is the lion eating tomatoes?

That is what my dear little cousin said while watching Planet Earth and saw that a lion was eating another animal. Oh how the minds of children work--it's pretty amazing!

Christmas was full of family--I probably celebrated three or four times with different family members--my birthday was celebrated the same amount of times as well. Christmas break was very relaxing and full of reading and trying my hardest not to do anything--this break is my last three week Christmas break of my lifetime. It started out visiting my friend joyce where it was snowing and cold! We had a lot of fun together. Then, I spent Christmas in Phoenix, AZ with some family. I spent my actual birthday in San Diego--relaxing. Then I went home to Bako for New Years until school started up again on January 12. Best thing that I got for Christmas was...Disney Wheel of Fourtune--pretty awesome game where all of the answers are Disney related.

joyce and I celebrating the end of the semester!

After many books and free food, I had to return to school to start my last semester of university. Once this semester is over, I will be able to become a nurse! YIPPEE!!! I am excited for school to end and more responsibilities to start (does that make me weird? Oh well). I'm excited to start my career as a nurse.

My cousin and I on Christmas!

Surprise!!

So, my birthday is in 15 days--that's right, three days after Christmas. Anyways, a couple of months ago I decided that I wanted to have a birthday party (I have not had a birthday party since I was 15 and before that, age 10--none of them have been fondly remembered), and one of my best friends was so excited to plan it! Well, as it got closer and the semester came closer to an end, I no longer wanted to be the focus of many people's attention at a party dedicated to me. I told my friend this and she was bummed, but respected my decision and asked if it would be okay to at least go out to dinner as friends. I agreed.

Well this week was full of theatre productions, two tests, a paper that needs to be done by Monday, regular classes, Secret Santa in my house with close group of friends, and work. Needless to say, I was very relieved that I no longer had a birthday party to think about or attend. Yesterday--I had yet to finish my paper (heck, I hadn't even started it!) and was determined to write it that day so I could focus my weekend on studying for finals (and the 10 hours of work that I am putting in as I write...). Another roommate, Heather, said that she would help me focus--we went to Panera (yum, yum!), then we were going to do a change of scene by going to a coffee shop that Heather and her old roommate used to frequent often in a different part of town.

After Panera--by this point, I had written a couple of pages, but was determined to finish the paper THAT NIGHT!--Heather had to go to Target to get a gift for a friend. Then she asked if it was okay if we stopped by a restaurant to get a gift certificate for another friend real quick. I call another friend who was going to meet us at the coffee shop to tell her we were on our way, but making a quick stop at this restaurant. She said that she was eating dinner with her mom in that restaurant at that very moment and that we should say hi to her and her mom when we stop in. We go in, and I am directed to her table to see...my sister! I thought, that's funny, why is Michelle eating dinner with Julia and her Mom? That is when everyone started to sing Happy Birthday! I was so shocked and surprised! There was almost 20 people there to celebrate! It was so good to see them all and I teared up a little. I can't believe that I had absolutely no idea! I reasoned that it was because Heather is so trustful that I could never imagine her lying to me--well she did! There was no cute coffee house and I have to admit, I was a little disappointed because she had talked up this coffee house so much that I was excited to go study there. My friends got me some awesome gifts (one being THE DARK KNIGHT! which we watched last night, of course!) and it was a great dinner and surprise.

This is Heather and me! Not last night, but we sure do look surprised!

In case you didn't already figure it out, I did not finish my essay last night, but woke up early today to finish it. And I did! Just in time before I had to rush off to work, which is where I am now, so I need to stop neglecting my duties. I just want to thank all of my amazing friends who did this for me! They are AWESOME!